I’ve been really remiss and as I sit here some 7 days after the fact I’m thinking…’what the hell have I been doing?’…so in a condensed menopausal nutshell this is all I can remember…
Day 56
Today I have an early Sat afternoon show, 2:00 and I’m still fretting over last nights show…I had a reviewer in the audience Jo Ledingham whom I singled out and asked if she was saying wonderful things about me…she said ‘not yet’…I then offered to pay her but she said there ‘wasn’t enough money’…eeeeekkkk…I’m not sure if she was giving me a hard time playing along or serious…I tried to get the audience to vote her out of the theatre, fringe survivor style…and pointed out that she giggled at one of my jokes…long story short…as you can see from the review she liked the show..but it was a long week waiting for her review to finally come out 6 days later…Martin and Karen packed up and left for their trek back to Calgary….it’s always so weird when I’m left alone on the road….I’m hypersensitive to my being by myself and I’m never really sure if I like me…it will take the rest of the day to get comfortable and then I’ll be my best buddy….my 2:00 show had a good turnout..about 70…Mark and I had to do a mad rush seconds before the show started, moving the furniture so I could work both sides…it was very weird!…no idea to blocking, feeling like I’m playing to a centre wall…bobblehead Tippi!…stayed after my show to take in the play Cassandra by Briana Brown…my friend Liz McEachern, had told me to see her show…it was very well done and very sweet..her laughs came from good natured 13 year old hijinxs…polar opposite to Tippi!….I ran into Kathleen Olivier and her partner on my trek to Granville…we gave each other a big hug and I thanked her profusely for the wonderful article and cover…she introduced me to her partner, who is expecting their first baby shortly and I had to contain myself…I so wanted to rub her belly!!! probably not a cool thing to do when just first meeting someone..anyhow, I hope Kathleen manages to have some free time during the week and we can go for a bite to eat and talk more..she strikes me as a very interesting woman…I spent the rest of the day walking about Granville flyering the other lines and chatting up everyone…it was again very bizarre as I had people say…”hey aren’t you?” or “hey, you’re famous”..with regard to the cover photo…..For fear of sounding like I’ve really lost it on the road I make this statement….Tippi is so unlike me!…I get embarrassed by that attention, like to hide away and be anonymous…Tippi loves that shit..it’s grist for her mill….I’ve spent the majority of this tour thinking….”No one look behind the Curtain”.
Day 57
Late show tonight, 10:15…I’ve spent most of today just hanging around the condo waiting for the time to pass..tick….tock….tick….tock…..thankfully the phone is internet based so after 57 days on the road I was finally able to have a halfways decent conversation with everyone back home..even got to play the “what are you wearing game”…small crowd tonight, but quite expected for a late Sun show..back to playing one side again
Day 58
Getting close to selling out the show…40 presold tickets tonight, so it’s a good sign…Mark said…”we’re opening both sides tonight”…I love an aggressive tech!…Mark is wonderful!..I love coming in early just to sit and talk to him…usually it’s 2 seconds before I’m supposed to be on stage and we’re still backstage laughing about something! He did have to slap me on the wrist as I went over by 12 min tonight…damn! I have to get my clock back up and running…with the improvisation I can lose track of the time depending on my audience…tonight it was good!..very good!..I was having way too much fun out there…my entire audience was either old married couples or gay men….it was a blast!….all this damn eye candy for Tippi and not one the least bit interested…for Tippi it’s like being at Octoberfest and them announcing that they ran out of Sausage!…it’s still a party, just not as spicy!
Day 59
I’m off for the next 2 days so I will be doing the tourist thingy!…today the plan of attack was Gastown, Chinatown and Granville Island and then catch 2 fringe shows…I was surprised at how close I am actually living in proximity to Gastown…everytime I was here with my ex it always seemed like such a long trip into Vancouver (avoiding obvious ex husband joke)..so this was a pleasant surprise….and I love Gastown…I had to go to the old spaghetti factory while I was there….even though I was immensley disappointed with my OSF visit in Winnipeg..this was a must…it is one very strong memory that I have as a child..going there for dinner with my mom and dad…I spent the meal a little melancholy missing my dad…..Chinatown, was a bit of a disappointment..it was a little run down, not as populous as Toronto’s and no outdoor markets…I had hoped for the mad hustle and bustle that is Toronto’s market….so after getting thoroughly lost on the streets and worried that I was now in not so great areas (Mark had warned me to stay off East Cordova) I ended up at the Science Works pavillion (they have the body works display on right now) and then headed along the sea wall to BC Place and some familiar streets…and then off to Granville Island for a tour of all the shops…after bumping into Jem and Shirley Kirchmann (from South Africa, How to Train your man)…Shirley pointed and laughed at my shoes..she loved the juxtaposition of abject poverty with 2 well manicured red toenails peeking out of holes…. I went and lined up for my 2 fringe shows….first,They Went another way…with Terri-Lyn Storey and Tanya Reid.(Terri-lyn and I finally met this year at the City tv day..if you go to my press section for Montreal..drinking in the fringe…we were both covered at Montreal and curious about each other…I also met the other fellow, David Trimble, in Calgary when we jointly did the ‘Flying Solo’ panel)…I enjoyed this show quite abit as it talks specifically to the lives of actors….the other show that I finally got to see after much waiting was Anton Smuts (South Africa, Stealing Venus)…it’s a great show…descriptive, character based narrative and exciting acting…and only about 9 people in the audience….at first when I had received so much press I felt guilty but in hindsight now, had Jane (Chinese Clown Cabaret and in the same venue) and I not received the press…this venue would be empty…it is so far removed from the main festival site that no one wants to walk to it….and so, stellar shows that have sold out across Canada sit near empty..it’s a very sad and disappointing ending for many of the touring companies.
Day 60
What was I thinking today!!???….I headed out for Stanley Park…a must see every visit…and the Aquarium…I love aquariums!..although I’ve only seen 2 in my life, Boston and Vancouver, they both intoxicate you with tranquility….but the question always comes to mind….why does Toronto not have an Aquarium?…spent $90 on fishy gifts for the kids, so with bag in hand I headed for the seawall…hey, why not go see that gun that fires every night at 9:00?….hey there it is..oh, look Lions Gate Bridge…I remember the ex saying there was a restaurant there…I haven’t eaten…I’ll walk over and have a cup of tea…dum de dum….ok, it’s a f__king long walk!..5km to be exact…halfway there my arm starts to hurt…hey, isn’t that a symptom of a female heart attack?…so a little paranoid and a touch over dramatic I finally make it to the base of the bridge…..and guess what?..there are no stairs to get up to the restaurant, just a sheer cliff on one side and ocean on the other…damn #*!@&!…pull out the map….well, I can turn around and go back 5km seeing stuff I’ve already seen or do the next 5km of new stuff…no other options…once you are on the seawall you either sprout hooves or fins to take any other path…so off I go to see what is around the corner of coal harbour…..and it’s OCEAN!….vast, beautiful, rolling ocean….and as I continue to walk I anticipate every corner….and the smell of rich cedar is omnipresent…at 6km the ocean decides to get rough and crashes against the sea wall….like a little girl I run in and out of the spray…I’m pretty much alone on the path or I wouldn’t be caught frolicking!… at 7km it’s a sandy beach…what would a trip to the west coast be without putting your feet in the ocean?…hey, I’m full of bad ideas!…after a game of ’you’re it’ with the ocean my jeans are wet up to my knees, weighing 50lbs and shoes full of sand..and I still have at least 3 more km…finally the seawall breaks and provides some options to it’s walkers…but the maps are really not clear and the paths not labelled..so I make my best estimate direction wise and head off into bush and giant redwoods (the most beautiful trees on the planet)….no sooner have I made the choice do I see 5 little raccoons begging for food by the side of the road and many people obliging..cute, but I kept my distance with visions of them gnawing my face off…but ever so cutely…perhaps if homeless people were issued raccoon masks they would fare better on our streets..finally I came upon the Lost Lagoon, full of every type of bird imaginable and then no sooner into familiar city streets…with leaden legs I climbed Denham, then Robson to look for groceries and wine and off to home… plans of a night on Granville had quietly left my mind without a fuss and I spent the night eating and watching tv….
Day 61
I can’t move! Oh my god what kind of cruel joke is this….ouch, ouch…it reminds me of 20 years ago going to the planeterium and those evil bastards just before you leave the darkness zap you for a millisecond with the light from a light bulb…and now everyone is wrathing around in pain, screaming I’m blind, I’m blind!…well, pain or no pain I have to trudge out to look for a Vancouver Courier paper because I’ve waited too long to see if Jo ledingham hated me..but no luck…I hobble about doing what errands need to be done but wary of venturing too far away for fear of not being able to make it back home….2nd last show tonight and it’s an early evening performance.. 5:45.. but it’s just shy of a sell out and again it’s a fun performance….Lissa and Christine (A woman of Independant means) stayed after the show to invite me to their roof top bbq on Friday…Lissa’s show adapted by Elizabeth Forsythe Hailey was a pick of the fringe last year..Lissa owns a theatre in California which she has invited me down to perform at!….I also had a visit from Eve Landers…(Marcella Marchica)…Monday Magazine had written in an article the following:
 And finally, while it’s far too late to make it happen this year, perhaps next year Intrepid could bring back Marcella Marchica from Fringe 2005 and put her on stage (with an open bar, natch) with Tippi Seagram and Atomic Vaudeville’s Flora. The three of them could lock cougar claws and razor quips in an absolutely fabulous battle of the wits. Meow!
…Eve wanted to let me know after my show that she would love to do something together…Gina McIntosh had already said yes in Victoria…so maybe something wild and wacky might just spring forth..how exciting!
I spent the rest of the evening waiting for a late night show to attend..The Excursionists…very funny in a silly, monty python way…I love that sense of humour because I so can’t do it and it catches me off guard everytime…I’ve seen alot of shows across Canada and I’ve been amazed by quite a few…Legoland and Cabarelesque were to me visually stunning, have it all productions..but yet my favorites are the comedies (call me biased…but I think comedy is the hardest form of theatre to do… well!…I think it is much easier to illicit sadness from your audience…just look at any 20sec dog food commercial that pulls at your heart strings to sell their product!) and so far, Giant Invisible Robot and The Excursionists do it for me…immensly imaginative, downright silly and laugh out loud funny.
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…but for years I remained indignant over this slight and worked even harder to be taken seriously….in hindsight now, with looks quickly fading or right off the bloom altogether, as pointed out in numerous reviews…I wish I had used the ‘face card’ more often ..muahhhhahaha for the powers of evil..muahhhhahahah…cough.
